Life, music and dreams

I took a couple of days off, which means I'm home for four full days in a row.
I didn't have the kids around this weekend;

Just spent some time by myself, getting up to date with sleep (it's been a rough couple of months on that department, been chatting around an awful lot with an insomniac lovely lady and I get up early in the morning...), reading a few pages, surfing, job hunting, no serious stuff.

I actually don't know that much where I'm going right now...

Should I stay at the sofa, hit the kitchen table?

I'm talking about Life in general...

I have some important decisions to make, some regarding money, some regarding family. I quit trying to decide anything about love because it never ever turns out the way I want expect.

But all of the above are getting me in a turmoil.

I once wrote - and if I didn't write it I told it to a lot of people, I'm sure - the only way (for me, up to now) to get over someone is to find the next one.

I NEED to find that next one.

The good part in this is that intelectually I know exactly where I am, but this sack of blood, shit, sperm and bones is not that good at acknowledging what the mind tells it (a bit like a slam by Grands Corps Malade http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EvmG8vjm-Q8).

I live a period in life where problems (money, divorce, etc) are starting to untangle, where I have people who care for me and people I care for, but I'm not happy and I don't like it.

Better yet, I decided to do something about it.

I just don't know what!

It would be a lot easier if the people I care for and the people that care for me were one and the same, so I guess that should be my priority.

But I told you before I stopped trying in that department, due to that want expectectations issue.

Life isn't made of dreams, even if I sometimes wish it were.

In the mean time, I've got my books and my music and someone to talk to and have interesting conversations, so I'll just make the best out of it while I don't reach a conclusion.

You'll be in it, for certain, whichever it is.

C you around

III. VTD - Visually Transmited Diseases

Back in the early '00s I was all about fair skin, dark haired, light eyed ladies - I even married one, once.

In '04 I got infected with a strange, new virus, a visually transmited disease: Ginger Virus!

Now my life has changed a bit during the last 2 years, most of the changes for worst or at least really different.
I'm finally picking up the bits and pieces of the mess I allowed to take place and guess what? There's your ginger virus again!
Life (emotional life, that is!) is moronic - one is very seldom happy with what he is or has, but when there is loss involved, it automatically gets bigger, whatever it is you lost (for me, at least).
I "lost" a wife and didn't even win back a friend - the Horror! The Tragedy! The Pain!
And then I stoped feeling sorry for myself after metting a new, interesting, vital, ginger girl.

Her part is done, my turn to play now.


Thank you Candy

C you around

I. In the begining there was light...

...as in a very light blog, with very light posts.
It's my first - I've been challenged to do one by a dear friend.
Not really challenged - we were talking abour hers and she asked me what would I write in mine.
No answer, no thoughs, no nothing.
The idea of launching and mantaining a blog never crossed my mind before.
But I'll give it a try - I always do.
So, writing for myself or for the casual reader will now consume part of my time - at least for a while!

C you around